Ever have those things that mean so much, that are so close, that matter more than they ever should? Ever been spread so thin that you can see the ice isn't even solid anymore? Ever known that you ought to be scared shitless but you also know that you can't? That's when you'll lose your nerve and it'll all cave in and crash around you? 

You know how that is? 

When you can't speak about any of it because there's nobody you can tell it to? So you hold it all in and it just rolls and waves and the surf of it pound against the inside of you, you try to let out what you safely can and hope the rest can find space to move without destroying you whole. 

You know that one also?

And what do you do? 

Drink.

Dance.

Write.

Walk. 

Cry...

Sing.

Photograph, draw, paint.

Pray for it to resolve...and pray that it never leaves,  because the void is harder to bear than the overwhelming stretch and tear of space.

Do you ever put your words and thoughts out in a way such as this, knowing that it will be misunderstood and taken for whatever it is that matters the most to the person reading? That isn't so bad in itself, especially when nothing else is given for a framework, and we all can only base information like this on what we ourselves know. What's worse is when someone decides what your nebulous thoughts mean based only on what perception they've allowed you to exist inside of in their world. That is always wrong. Always. People should know that, remember that, and try very hard to not do that. That alone causes so many problems. Relationships would be so much better...

Ok. That's enough out so that I can meditate a bit and sleep. 

no song.

the one i want would be misunderstood.