and yet again

I sincerely hope that I do not come across as melancholy. 

I'm not.

Truly. A sometimes sad romantic, a bleeding ball of hope and the wearer of beautiful pink glasses. If life is what we see it as, then I see it as lovely.

With the pain that comes, the joy can be as equal, if we let it. I'm uncertain about so many things in my life right now, but I'm thrilled to be standing in the places that I am. The uncertainty comes from the willingness to move ahead into the spaces that are mine. It's been a long winter in my life, it's been a long opening of the shell again. It's been an exciting time of drying wings and setting feet, focusing on what life looks like, getting to know myself on a deep level.

I admit that I believe in all things good. I admit that I know that not all things are good. I walk that line of awareness and selective blindness. I believe in music as a source in the soul. I believe in art as a means of reflecting what our spirits feel. I believe in capturing images of time and moment that touch us, that mean something. I believe in taking stands. I believe in bending. I know that I believe in love, in all forms. I believe in trust, though I know how that may sound. 

I believe in things that I know are truth, even though there is no practical explanation. 

I believe in taking chances.

I believe in no regret. 

Sorrow, it is a companion. I don't think that there is a soul that thinks or feels deeply outside of themselves that is not walking with sorrow. Yet I also believe that there is beauty inside that sorrow.

I believe in dreams, whether they come true or not.

I believe in hard work. In doing good. In caring.

So, at times, I may sound very melancholy. Drama filled. Secret driven. 

I'm not. 

I'm simply human, of the woman variety. 

I choose to trust. I choose to try. I choose to love, to live, to work hard, to give.

That's me. 

Happy Thursday, all of you that I care so deeply for, whether you know it or not. It comes free. It's complete. And very, very real. 

xoxo

(ps: on that note, i pulled on my size 4 jeans this morning without unzipping or unbuttoning. Must remember to eat now. 2 is as low as I should let myself get, i believe in that as well. There's the woman thing.)